Realized I Don't Know All That Much

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress or grievances.

- The  United States Constitution, 1st Amendment

For various reasons, that I might get around to explaining within this, I've realized that I don't know and understand the governing documents of the US well enough. I know your basic information about them but I don't really understand how they work and adapt to different situations and the impact that has on our lives. I've decided I'm to be doing some research on it (random aside: I find myself missing being in school and wanting to research and write papers and essays on various topics). 

I've been reading a lot about the American education system lately (mostly because at some point in my life I want to be part of fixing it which means I have to understand what it's problems and limitations are) and to me at least, I don't feel like I've become a well-rounded citizen which I believe is an important part of an education. The purpose of education in a democracy is to create citizens who have the basic knowledge needed to make good voting decisions. If I, a highly educated young woman, feel that I don't know enough about my government and how it works, there must be at least a few others out there feeling the same way. 

Anyway, there was a lot more that I had intended to write about but I went off on a different tangent and forgot the original intentions except that I have decided that I will include an epigraph in every post. I think I'm going to try to have it relate to the subject of the post, maybe not though. For the first posts it will be a combination of the Constitution and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. The way I see those are two of the most important documents that recognize my personal rights as a living human being. 

Was All Kinds Of Productive

So, time is closing in on my departure date for Europe, crazy as that is. Only about thirteen days now until I leave. I got an email from my future boss dude saying I officially have a work visa! So that is a huge weight off my shoulders. I just have to mail a passport type photo over before I leave and then it's completely and totally taken care of.

I went out earlier today and walked to a Target near my house. I filled some prescriptions there and then walked over to the ups store and had my photos taken. I had to get six taken for various things. It was really cool. So, I've had a passport since I was 13. I don't remember taking the photos for that one. I got it renewed when it expired a few years back and had my photos taken at the post office in Davis. They had a digital camera there and I got to see the pictures before they were printed out. Today, the guy took it on a dinosaur of a camera. It was about the size of a family size cereal box, maybe a bit deeper, and it was ... shoot I totally forget what they are called but it where the image is transferred to the paper inside the camera and it is completely developed in a few minutes only. Anyway so it was one of those kind of cameras. So cool!

I only need to send one photo over to Brussels but I had six taken and it is super extra exciting why (at least to me). I'm in the middle of applying for Irish citizenship! And I'm finally being productive about finishing up my application. Part of it is sending over two passport sized photos and now I have them which will allow me to get on with a bunch of other stuff as well. Hopefully I'll get everything finished and be able to send it off before I leave. Once it is approved I can live and work anywhere in the EU with practically no restrictions! Hell yes!

I also worked on my itinerary for the first few weeks that I'm going to be in Europe. My mom is totally freaking out about me leaving on my own and hopefully this will help her out a bit. She's probably going to know where I am at all times better than I do. She's asked me to get in contact with her every single day to let her know that I'm still alive and well (I personally think it's overkill but it'll make her happier so I'm going to do it). To make that easier on her I set up Skype on her phone and taught her how to use that and how to text which are probably going to be the easiest ways to contact me. Now however I'm able to access communication, she'll be able to see it right on her phone wherever she is, yay.

A few days ago I reserved my hostels in Paris and in Brussels and bought my train ticket from Paris to Brussels. I'm basically set except for the fact that I don't have a place to live yet after I've actually started the internship. It'll fall into place though I'm sure. I'm really not too worried about it. Thank the cosmos though for the internet. I don't know how people traveled before without being able to check things out before arriving in a completely different country.

On a completely different note: I've been watching a lot of TV lately. Not a very broad swatch of shows so much as a really deep one. I've watched the entire series of Bones, Eureka and (not quite as impressive) Being Human. It had gotten to the point that I would stay up far past my bed time watching episodes back to back because I was just so engrossed in them. Hopefully now I'll be able to get back to normal and fall asleep at a decent hour ;)

Lived In Purgatory For Two Months

So apparently Purgatory is different than what I thought it was. According to my trusty dictionary it's basically hell, which in retrospect makes sense as you'd be purging your sins. But one of my favorite fantasy authors used it as the name for Limbo, so that's what I mean when I say purgatory. Anyway, this two and a half months between school and the internship is doing wonders on my psyche and not all in a good way.

I feel lost half of the time even though I know where I'm going ... it's just that it's taking forever to get there. I hate waiting especially when I know exactly when something is going to happen. If I'm waiting for something that is sometime off in the future at some unspecified date, that's okay, not great but bearable. But waiting for a specific thing, a specific time, a specific departure is torture. I just want to leave tomorrow, right this minute if I could, and get on with it. It's like I'm running a 400 meter hurdle run and I've gotten over all of the hurdles but decided to take a water break right before the finish line. I'm afraid that if I don't go through with this right away, I'm going to lose momentum, that I already have lost a bit of it. Sometimes, I'm absolutely terrified about going to Europe alone and planning on living in country where granted I know a bit of the language but not enough ... argh.

But then I tell myself that everything I'm scared of will just enrich the experience and me in the long run. And I do enjoy throwing myself into something without worrying about the future, I've had practice with that, so I should be fine.

Maybe these few months of nothing are a boon. I have the chance to purge myself not of sin but of doubt, insecurity, fear, and regrets. Not to become a new person, just clean a bit of the dirt off so a bit more of me is visible to the future.