Wanted To Go 'Home'

I really don't like not having a plan, it just sucks. I don't mean the kind of plan where all the nitty-gritty details are mapped out. Those just suck the joy out of life. I mean the big picture, hazy in the distance, that's where I want to end up kind of plan. And right now, I don't have one. I know what I'm going to be doing, mostly, until mid-July but after that I have absolutely no idea and I really really don't like that, at all. I always have a plan. It might change, in fact, it does change, sometimes on a daily basis, but there is always something there to hold on to and take my bearings from. Sometimes that constant plan ends up as plan C or D but it's still there to fall back on if I need to. And I don't even have that right now. I'm finding, being alone over here and all that, that I need some stability in my life. I guess I've never liked the idea of needing it because I've romanticized the idea of traveling around the world and going off on awesome adventures and all that crap. As amazing as it is to be over here, I really don't know if I could do it forever. I want to end up in a place and stay there, never have to move again. And I'd always liked the idea of doing it in a new place but now I'm not so sure. I don't mind the idea of ending up living in the Bay Area, actually it'd be pretty cool to live in the neighborhood I grew up in as a kid. I have good memories there.